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Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Hi earthlings. Seems like I almost everyday also updating. I just feel like it now. I was able to sleep early last night but end up 12plus then sleep. Today morning woke up, end up going back to sleep again. Yes, means I didn't went to school. Thanks for those who had asked why I didn't went to school. I appreciate it. I'm fine. Until 10plus woke up and mama asked me to accompany her to see doctor. Went to grandma house first cause my father needed shoe for dinner. Put down and walked back to my house. Mama see doctor finish, came home, bath, and went to meet Damien. He say he needed someone to accompany him. Since I live near him so yea. I agreed and went to meet him. I couldn't be specific here. I only can say, I met him and I was studying halfway. He suddenly asked me what happened to me. What's bothering me. By then, I lost my control. I cried, in front of him, twice .. Because I miss him so much. Donald that is. He won't be looking at this so it doesn't matter whether his name is written here or not. It just hurts so much. I was clinging my fist so tight, tighter than you can imagine. But Damien held my hand and let me cling his hand instead. He must be feeling pain on his hand because I really cling so tight, and I just cry and cry and cry .. He is the first guy that actually witnessed me break down and cried like how I always cried in the night before I sleep. I was fighting to hold back my tears so hard. He might not see this. But I wanna thank him, for his shoulder, for wiping my tears, for comforting me. It wasn't enough crying though .. I could actually cry out everything, end up thinking and seeing him being more upset than me, I've no rights to cry so much in front of him. I came home at 7plus. Jeffrey called me saying it's raining heavily at his camp, and asked if I still don't wanna go home. That moment I was actually on my way home. Thanks for your concern, Jeffrey. I know you're worried, and jealous(?), haha. Home, bathed, and went to watch Tom & Jerry. No matter how much I watch it, even if I had watched it before, I still find it awesome. It's one of my favourite childhood cartoon. I bet most people likes it too. Because everyone wish to have a relationship like them. They always fight, but they would never leave one another. Time seems to be running so fast that I couldn't catch up. I do not understand. How can every of my ex move on so fast, yet I couldn't do the same as them? Why couldn't I move on? Why couldn't I forget? Why is it bothering me so much? I hate it. I hate what I am right now. Staying strong had become such a difficult task for me now. What am I suppose to do .. What's the point for still thinking of someone that I know deep down inside me, he's not gonna come back? It's so frustrating. Had been listening to songs, living inside there, avoiding reality. Reality is cruel. Life is a bitch. I guess I could sleep right away now due to cry too much. I just miss you, so much, so badly .. Are you listening? Could you hear me crying so loud to you? You can't even hear a single squeak. I'm right here, I'm haven't move a single inch, waiting for you when I know I had to get going .. Someone. Save me .. I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I've hurt you from my actions and words. It's hard for you, I know. All I need now, is time. Give me time. To think. To adjust. Patience .. Shall watch few more episodes of Tom & Jerry and sleep. Good nights earthlings.  Because I do .. I miss you badly .. Gosh. I'm breaking down again. I love you still, ever since then .. 15th's. |
This is my blog. I write whatever I want. You've no right to judge me. Continue to stay if you are happy. Not happy? S-C-R-A-M. :D Tyvm. :D  Vera / Jiayun. ♥ First cry on 02Jan'95. I'm single. Respect and treat me like how you want me to treat you. ^^ I'm a fan of SHINee, B2st, B1A4, BTOB. Overall, I'm friendly and a little insane, feel free to add me in facebook/twitter @veramissyou. Life has always been a huge roller coaster ride for me and now I'm really getting tired of it. I just wanna put everything down and let go. " She’s a little girl, living in her perfect world Until the bad guy come, and tore everything apart.."  Name: Kim Jonghyun. Nickname: Bling Bling Jonghyun. DOB: April 8th, 1990. Position: Lead Vocal.  DOB: June 6, 1991. Nickname: Sonseuko, 16 D. Name: Son Dong Woon. Specialty: Piano and traditional chinese.  DOB: November 18, 1991. Name: Jung Jinyoung. Position: Leader, Vocalist.  Name: Shin Dong Geun. Stage Name: Peniel. Birthday: March 10, 1993. Position: Vocalist, Dancer. the sites. Angie. Damian. Dionis. Emily. Geoffrey. Huixin. Hweeling. Recca. Joycelyn. Jieyun. Joslyn. Julia. Jesslyn. Kevin. Kyrene. Lynnie. Liru. Lisha. Michelle. Shiwen. Sean. Sean. Sophia. Tyco. Weiting. Yiwen. Yiping. Vera Luvz  Create Your Badge • Add if you want. August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 October 2012 November 2012    Create a playlist at MixPod.com |
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