Sunday, November 28, 2010
   Hello~ Came back to post. :D Went to find mother on wednesday to go school buy books. After buying we went back home. Mother go out &I, stayed home? I think. Thursday I forgotten what happen. Oh, I went out with darling is it? Hmms, I also forgotten. ._. Friday tk, nothing much also. Saturday, meet boyf! :D He accompany me go my grandma house to put my clothes. Go back kanna scolded, kao. -.- Thanks boyf for calming me down. ^^ We went to Suntec. We went to walk around, look CDs, &other shops. We walk until tired &we went to sit down awhile. &I cried, I think I'm just too sensitive? I don't know. ): Then went to have pepper lunch. boyf really can eat sial, he ate two you know~ Prodie. After that we went to Esplanade. Well, I from 3 Dec - 9 Dec going oversea, & 3 Dec is our 5th month. ♥ So he decided to celebrate on saturday. We stand & face towards the flyer, damn nice. boyf promise me will bring me go sit one hor!? Darling, we go sit together okay! I know you want who but got me better! Stand until tired so we went to sit down. &boyf surprise me with something. Yeps, guess you should know, couple ring. I was shocked, so touched. He is so silly! Couple necklance &ring also he buy! but boyf, really thanks & I love you a lot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ♥ You will wonder why I didn't give him anything? Nope, I did, I did it a lot earlier. I bought a couple shirt for us. The shirt say, "I ♥ Jerrold" "I ♥ Vera". He ask me how much he want return so I say $3, but I gave him back &it actually cost $13 for his. &we both were wearing it out on that day. ^^ Sit awhile &we went to take mrt back to Aljunied, then walk back home. While walking to take mrt, guess who I saw? Someone unusual. I know darling will gone crazy, yeps, we saw WanQiTai. He was with a bunch of people, boyf say hi to him, he say hi, ask each other where we going, then we walked off. I was shock sial~ LOL. He sent me home as usual &he went home. Watch Naruto halfway &my brother ask me accompany him go mac eat. So I did, home awhile &boyf dozed off. Slept at 3plus. Today 12pm woke up, go prepare &went to have lunch with parents as usual. brother tag along too. Ate finish &went to take mrt down to Somerset. &something made me really pissed. It's my station, I need to alight, I want to go out. Cb, those vietnam ones keep stand there &keep laugh, I say excuse me so loud they like act blur like this. I can actually go out de, a bunch of teenagers, mostly bangala, keep push in, like they rushing to don't know where like this. Until the door close, go Orchard &take one more stop back again. &behind got one guy keep push push push, I like sandwich like that, stuck in the middle. -.- Make me sibeh dulan. Went Cineleisure, cause going out with binbin. He another one, make me more pissed, he say 4 at there, he 4.30 then reach. Make me stand there like one idiot for 30mins. ._. Grr. Went to collect ticket, &went to walk around. He go in the new print machine, I wanted to go in &see he suddenly come out, I chua tio. LOL. I really jump yi xia sial, &he keep laugh! So bad. We went to watch movie at 5pm, it's Repunzel is it? I forgot how spell. It's nice &funny. After movie we went to amk to have pepper lunch. Thanks binbin for the movie &dinner! ^^ & I waited boyf to come amk, he then accompany me home. We had a small quarrel, but nothing already. Reached home &my brother ask me go down buy dinner for him. Wth, my head is like super pain, like going faint, he still ask me go buy. I bo bian, so I went down to get for him. Home &watch Channel U, got kpop thing, but abit boring cause no SHINee. Switch off &came to post. Okay lah, shall end here. ^^! Wednesday, November 24, 2010  An-nyung! I'm back to my pathetic blog. Today morning went to darling's house &saw her changing blogskin. So I decided to change too, if not I at home really nothing to do. but also, do until I per-cher. Hers is nice, simply go my link &click Lynnie. She haven't really finish so it may look abit empty as she created a new one. This skin is darling find for me de, I came home find others not really so nice so I took this. Thanks darling. ♥ Well, it's been a week plus ever since I last posted. I kinda forgot what happen. I know last week is a busy week cause of working. Earn earn earn to buy shirt. Yeps, me &boyf bought a so called couple shirt. So nice~ :D We've been quarrelling for a long time, now, I think it's stable, maybe? I not sure. Yesterday met boyf &his friend. We went Suntec, Esplanade, then pepper lunch. :D Had fun with him. He say I chor-lor leh! Wth. LOL. Okay lah, shall post until here jiu hao. Needa go out find mummy awhile! Ciao~ Tuesday, November 9, 2010 Just came back not long after I met boyf. Things are happening &going wrong this few days. I don't know how to start. boyf had changed to another person. I'm no longer important to him. He's friends are much more important now. He no longer can read my mind. He no longer know what I really want from him. All I want is just his love &accompany. Yet just now, he left me, he left me to go gym training with his friend when I needed him the most by my side. It's the second time he did that. Heart broken, seriously hurt, disappointed. At home crying all alone, so lonely, feeling so lonely, so dark. I don't want him to leave, I don't want him to go, I want him to be by my side. Hint &hint &hint, yet in the end he still went off. broke into tears right after I reached home. We're so drift apart now. He's getting further &further, which I tried to reach, yet I can't touch. I used to be so important to him, but why.. I've love him so much.. It feels like, it's our last meeting today, we won't be able to see each other again. Why must this happen to me. My head is so pain now, yet my heart pains a thousands time more. I don't want to let go, I want to hold on, but I couldn't touch his heart anymore. After I said so much, cry so much, wish so much, nothing changes. I'm a nobody to him, not even a single bit. Promise, what is promise, it's nothing. before holidays, he promised he will give me all his time after his N just to accompany me. Yet? I doubt he remember. I'm feeling that he's trying to his old self just to make me happy. It felt so fake, what he's doing is just being force &pretending. I don't know what to do.. He's gonna slowly forget the fun, laughter, sadness, crazyness, shyness, sweetness, cuteness, memories, love, &last of all, me. He's slowly gonna leave all memories behind, including me. It's gonna vanish soon, &I don't want to.. I really wanna hug tight him now, but he's gone, no longer by my side.. I've so much to say, but who's willing to listen to me? Not even him. What's more to do now.. - bye. Saturday, November 6, 2010    Hi. :D I suddenly feel like posting so I came. As I feeling really shag &down now, it's my only best friend that will listen to me. Thursday I forgotten what happen. Stay up till 5plus.a.m. then I sleep, pro hor. Woke up 11plus in the morning. Tired. ._. Friday, it's a public holiday. Happy belated Deevapali ( Sorry I forgot how to spell ). ^^ Morning woke up prepare. Wait for Hsienyung kor go prepare, parents went off first. We went to have lunch as usual during Sundays. This time is we whole family, 5members go eat together. After eating Hsienyung kor went off first. The rest of us went to take cab down to Marine Parade. We went to my mother's side de grandpa house as it's his birthday. Happy belated birthday grandpa. ^^ A lot people were there. Sit around awhile &we went off. Head down to parkway to go walk walk. Took bus back, parents &brother went home, met Terence at paya lebar mrt. We don't know where to go so we went to Marina barrage. ( Sorry darling if you see this. ) Took mrt down to Marina bay, &we took the bus go. Reach there, it was raining, but not so heavy, just a slight rain. Went to walk around. &we went up to sit. See people flying kites, it's beautiful when you look up into the sky &see those kites, especially during night time. It's so nice, as if there's a lot of "stars" up there. The Singapore Flyer, the lights everything, it's so nice to look at. I wish to go there again, during night time, with not so much people, &enjoy the peace. Thanks Terence for accompanying me, comforting me. Hope he's alright too. (: Took bus back to mrt, &met boyf at Macpherson mrt. We sat around awhile &we went home. When I reached home, something serious happen. I don't wish to post it up here, if you want to know, ask me. I'll see if I'm okay to tell you, if can't I'm sorry. It really scare the hell out of me, I just broke into tears. but everything's fine now. After that incident, went to on com. Talking to boyf on msn, &I told him that I can feel he don't love me anymore. So yea, he said everything out. I cannot take it, I just went to my mother's room &cried. Awhile later boyf called me, so I answered. I was like talking &crying. Sort out some things &we were okay. It was already 4am, he's tired, so he went to sleep. Yet me? Stay up whole night. Morning brother father go work, elder brother go out, mother go out, left me home. boyf say he wanted to meet, so I anything. Met him &we went to darling's house to pass her money. Done &we sat at the staircase to think where to go. In the end we walk to paya lebar mrt &took mrt down to Marina bay. Guess you know where we were going, yes, Marina barrage. We took bus down, &we walk up &sat a somewhere where there is not much people. Faking up a smile all day long. Until I couldn't take it anymore, I cried. &we sort out things again. We then from there walk back to Marina bay mrt. &we took mrt down to city hall &go Suntec to have pepper lunch. Saw darling &minming there, so coincidence. The world is so small. Saw two little cute xmm, got one look like Mosa, another look like Donald Duck. Lol. Eat finish &we went to take bus to paya lebar mrt. Accompany boyf to top up his ezlink &we went to take bus back to my house nearby hawker centre. He say he is still hungry, he's a big eater anyway, so I accompany him go eat. In the end he ate dessert. Done &he send me home. Wanted to lend him an umbrella but the umbrella don't know fly where. He say give him newspaper can already, so I did. He went home, I went to bath. Well, I just want to type out how I actually is feeling &thinking. From yesterday night, after my boyf told me all that stuffs, I've been thinking about it. Even now, I'm still thinking. It actually hurts, really, it hurts. It's been so long ever since I felt so hurt. If you're in my facebook, you probably will see what I've post. "Why, why must you do this to me when I'm actually so in love with you, when I need you so much, yet you let me fight all alone. What I've done wrong. Always thought you are so different from the people I knew, but it turns up wrong. It's so hurting, really hurting, never felt so hurt before. Thanks to you, I am now..... Promise, love, what's that? It's just empty." Yes, that's what I've posted. I don't know why, I'm so in love with him now. I used to get that kind of love from him, but not now anymore. He don't love me that much like how he used to be right after an incident. Just because of him, he lost everything in me. Feelso regret, so guilty, so sad, so hurt. I couldn't feel that I'm being loved anymore. He said he lost faith, lost that kind of love in me. He said he thought of breaking with me yet he doesn't know how to tell me. That time, I really needed him by my side, couraging me, accompany me. Yet he told me all those, he just left me there, facing the problem myself which I couldn't. I thought, all along I thought, he was so different, really different from all the bastards I've known, but looks like my prediction is wrong, totally wrong. He promised he won't leave me. He promised he will always love me forever. He promised he'll treat me good &care for me, only me. He promised he won't ignore me. He promised he'll always be by my side. He promised he won't anyhow shout/scold me. He promised me a lot of things, promise promise promised. Yet he broke, broke, broke, &broke. Just like what my darling used to say. "Promise are meant to be broken, forever don't exist." Is it true? Can we ever change it? I thought he could, he's able, he will prove me that it's wrong. but it seems like I'm the one who is wrong. What I wanted wasn't anything from the world, but the strong, extremely strong love he used to have for me. I can don't want anything, I just want that, only that. He used to listen to me. He used to tell me eveything without hiding anything from me. He used to not shout at me loudly. He used to not get so angry easily. He used to be so gentle to me. He used to care for me as if I'm seriously injured when I just have a small little cut or cough. He used to hug me so tight that he don't wanna let go. He used to not avoid my kiss. He used to really stick to me like a super glue. He used to love to talk to me. He used to be worry &anxious &wondering why I didn't reply him. He used to text me whenever right after he send me home. He used to talk to me a lot, like non-stop. He used to be so sweet to me. He used to be happy when he sees me. He used to smile just looking at my text, even by thinking of me. He used to miss me so. He used to laugh with me even if it's the lame-est thing. He used to always play with me. He used to hold my hand so tight. He used to always pinch my face &say I'm chubby &cute. He used to hug me in his arms, &whisper softly into my ear, "iloveyou". He used to take me as his everything. He used to take me as a super duper important person. He used to be so naggy. He used to be so stubborn. He used to scold me yet not really scold when I did something naughty. He used to plan things &see if I want or don't want, okay or not okay. He used to kiss me, tendered, that I could feel the strong love inside him. He used to always sayang me face &head. He used to be there, telling me not to be scare whenever I'm frighten. He used to be so good. He used to help me carry anything whenever we go out. He used to always wait for me to sleep first before he could sleep no matter how tired he is. He used to be so random. He used to be understandable. He used to treat me like a princess, like I'm his one &only. That's a lot he used to. but what I've mention up there, it's gone. He is not the "he used to" anymore. Change, everything changes. It's been 4months with him, I don't want &I'm afraid of losing him. He said he still love me but not that strong anymore. but I'm afraid, seriously afraid he's love will slowly goes off, bit by bit. &that time, I really have the face &fight all alone, I don't want to seriously. I want to last long with him. He used to not be the one I've loved a lot, but he is, he's the guy I've love seriously a lot in my whole life now. I used to be that to him too, but too bad I'm not now. He promised he will change, he'll change back to his old self. but will he? Can he? I trusted him, but I don't want any false hope. I love him, really. Who knows how I feel now, only I know the best. but I really need him, I need him, I need him to love me, like he used to be. boyf, I know you will isn't it?.. Please, I beg you, I really want your extremely strong love back. I really want all the "you used to" to come back too. I know it's a matter of time. I can't wait, I can't really wait, but I'll try my best to. Never felt so hurt, so hard to breathe.. So much to say, yet I don't know how to express everything out. Sigh. Shall stop here, if not I'll die of crying. Nights.. Wednesday, November 3, 2010  Hello! I'm back, to continue my post. Well, it may not be long this time, cause nothing much really happen. Sunday morning woke up early to prepare. &headed down to tk for "assembly". Sat in different bus with Yiwen they all, so sad. Went to different places of temple to baibai. After that went back tk rest awhile &went home with mother. Reached home &went to prepare. Done &met Constance at bishan mrt as we're going Orchard. Cause we wanted to buy SHINee's poster. Head to Cineleisure but the 'Hello' poster is out of stock. Told her that the day before I saw that poster when I was at Suntec with my boyf. So we took mrt to city hall &went to Suntec to see. &yeps, we saw &we bought it. It is pasted at my room wall now, darling should know yea. :D After buying we went to mammam dinner together. Done &boyf called, met him at city hall mrt. We accompany her take mrt halfway. She suddenly say she going Serangoon find her boyf, so okay lor. She alight at Serangoon &boyf accompany me home. Heeeeee. Thanks boyf! :D Monday, morning went school for POA remedial. After that went to meet boyf, he came down to fetch me. (L) Went grandma house to take some files back home, if not grandma keep nag nag nag. Just like boyf, naggy piggy boyf. x: Think he's gonna kill me after seeing this, HAHAHA. He helped me carry some back to my house. &we went to walk walk, he bought bbt for me, then went back to my house downstairs sit awhile, waiting for my brother to call as he wanted me to accompany him go eat dinner. boyf pei me wait for him at bus stop, &he went off after I met my brother. Eaten, home, rest awhile &went to run, back, bathed, use com awhile, sleep. Tuesday morning went to darling house. &we went to have mac for breakfast. After that back to her house, we use com awhile, then went to bed & watch show. 'Nightmare', so nice &digusting. After that went home &rest. Dozed off after awhile. Woke up, bathed, went down to have dinner with mother. Home &talked to boyf. Then later at night we quarrelled. &it's like our 4th month &we're actually quarrelling. ._. but after that we are okay already. Parents were quarrelling in the middle of the night, so loudly. I couldn't sleep for the whole night. /: Morning went to darling house slept for awhile, &went home. Prepare, &met boyf at mrt. He don't look happy. ): but in the end we're back to normal, I think. We went to have lunch together. &we had Pepper Lunch. :D He keep look at me! Make me stress only. After that he bought chocolate for me. Heee. We went to bus stop to take bus home. He say take 133, we took, &the bus stops. &he say he think he sit wrong. LOL. We alight &took another bus, 70 to paya lebar mrt &take 154 home. Reached home &prepare, went to take bus to Aljunied mrt &meet Yiwen. Took mrt down to Simei &went Long John as she wanted to eat. &we're gossiping about the who, yea the who. Went back to tk. Not much people came today. Terence came late, was surprise when he came, o.o. Ended &went home bathed, I came to post cause got reason one. Happy 4th month to my beloved precious dearest sweetest boyf! (L)!! So fast hor, yea indeed. Okay, shall go talk to boyf now. Nights! :D |
This is my blog. I write whatever I want. You've no right to judge me. Continue to stay if you are happy. Not happy? S-C-R-A-M. :D Tyvm. :D  Vera / Jiayun. ♥ First cry on 02Jan'95. I'm single. Respect and treat me like how you want me to treat you. ^^ I'm a fan of SHINee, B2st, B1A4, BTOB. Overall, I'm friendly and a little insane, feel free to add me in facebook/twitter @veramissyou. Life has always been a huge roller coaster ride for me and now I'm really getting tired of it. I just wanna put everything down and let go. " She’s a little girl, living in her perfect world Until the bad guy come, and tore everything apart.."  Name: Kim Jonghyun. Nickname: Bling Bling Jonghyun. DOB: April 8th, 1990. Position: Lead Vocal.  DOB: June 6, 1991. Nickname: Sonseuko, 16 D. Name: Son Dong Woon. Specialty: Piano and traditional chinese.  DOB: November 18, 1991. Name: Jung Jinyoung. Position: Leader, Vocalist.  Name: Shin Dong Geun. Stage Name: Peniel. Birthday: March 10, 1993. Position: Vocalist, Dancer. the sites. Angie. Damian. Dionis. Emily. Geoffrey. Huixin. Hweeling. Recca. Joycelyn. Jieyun. Joslyn. Julia. Jesslyn. Kevin. Kyrene. Lynnie. Liru. Lisha. Michelle. Shiwen. Sean. Sean. Sophia. Tyco. Weiting. Yiwen. Yiping. Vera Luvz  Create Your Badge • Add if you want. August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 October 2012 November 2012    Create a playlist at MixPod.com |
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